so this is a bit of a self reflection exercise put in the public domain. why? BECAUSE I CAN!
in the corporate land we talk about planning and you are always asked the question in a job interview "where do you see your self in x number of years" well i turn 25 in 32 days. so the question came to mind i started making affirming comments and decided to post them.
When i am 30 i will be:
5 years older
married- i hope
paying off a morgatge on my own home
working in the sports industry
doing somthing remarbale in scouting
still at a reasonable size
and most importantly
enjoying life and still exploring.
well lets see how this goes in 5 years :-D
i could elaborate on things if you wanted. but i get the feeling that i am talking to my self most of the time on here
Monday, May 17, 2010
Saturday, May 01, 2010
From 100-80
so. my story. well one of my many stories. that will tell you a small bit of my life. i poured some of my deepest thoughts out in my blog posting about anzac day. and today i will air some of my darkest and toughest secrets. i will share with you some of my thoughts and just what it means to be me.
i was always that kid. the one at the back. the one who couldn't. the one who just didn't quite fit. the one who floated from group to group trying to find a place to belong, never quite getting there. and i found my places to belong, to find my purpose. i found happiness in the darkness of the theater and the quiet of the library. a sports lover who found his solace in the shadows. i still attracted my fair share of attention and collected my accolades.
i found joy in the oddest of places. i was happy. i fought some battles, some larger than others. i knew i was never going to be the best academically, because of my learning disability. i knew that i wasn't going to be the best and i was going to be lucky to get into university after a damaged my brain. that was square one all over again. but i battled through. i saw the next day. and i was stronger, even if a little bit damaged for ever.
i made it through uni, i was happy. i found a job, i was happy. i looked in the mirror and i was happy enough with what i saw. until one day i stepped onto the scales.
triple digits.
i realised i had to do something. but that wasn't enough. the day when i discovered that my pants were getting to tight at a size 38 and i was approaching a size 40, that was the turning point. it wasn't anything but that key.
but the question was how to make the change. well here we go.
it wasn't until almost 6 months into my employment at MARC that i decided to commit to it. with a few small changes i had dropped to around the 97 kg mark. and with some support and guidance, i found my way to 90 kgs. but couldn't break it. for about a year i stabilised at that point. but through out the next year i continued. i found a class i enjoyed, i started to improve. i slowly moved from being the middle of the pack to being towards the front. i was no longer that kid. i was average. but i still knew there was more. come the six week challenge in 2009, i decided i was going to go for it. and i did. i committed to making changes. i started to make time for everything i wanted in my life. and eliminated that wasn't important. i started living every day. i started riding my bike to work once a week. i started making decisions for me. i realized that i could be even more than what i had thought i could be. just where would it end? with the support and encouragement of some amazing people i went from being that kid at the back, to be that guy at the front. i achieved level 10 on the beep test. i did a 5km fun run in 26 minutes. and i felt and looked good. but i wondered if i could go further. but then i started to get bogged down in the fact i was leaving. a plane awaited me. i was going over seas.
and i was static. i was walking, but my fitness was not improving. and even going backwards in places. so i didnt go back to the old fall back of "it will be ok in the end". no. i was a changed person, and followed the same advice i gave others. take control. and be the change agent in your life. so i set about exercising once or twice a week. with the walking i was doing each day, it was enough.
then came the day when i was curious. there are scales in the bathroom here, where i live right now. i stepped onto them. and the number came up. 190 pounds. and the next time i stepped onto those scales 180 pounds is the number that greeted me. and then one day i noticed that the needle was sitting just below the small number that said 80kgs. the last time i had weighed in at that weight i was 15/16. nearly a full decade ago. unlike other times, the weight has stayed off. why? because this time, it was life style choices and not a commitment to pushing my self that has made the difference. i eat smaller meals. i eat a good balance of the nutritional groups. i eat fruit again. but it is the advice and the knowledge that i could from the challenges that i knew i could.
so what have i achieved in the past 12 months?
Completed a 5km fun run in under 27 minutes.
started swimming regularly and now do over 1.5kms in a session, pushing towards 2kms.
reached Level 10 in the beep test
probably dropped a pants size.
and i think i am probably the fittest i have been in a very very long time.
now then today i don't think i could do all that. because i haven't been doing any running training. and i am not working out every day. i am merely sustaining what i have achieved.
there is a part of me that know i can go further, but i don't know about my weight. i think i may be close to bottoming out, without compromising muscle mass. (thanks to the BMI i have to weight <75 kgs to be "normal" weight). so i wonder. maybe i can work towards doing something silly like a triathlon. maybe. or an epic canoe trip. or who knows what.
but after all that rambling i will pass on a simple message. i decided to make a change. when i am unhappy with my circumstances i set about making a change. i control my own life and i am master of my own destiny. yes there are things that i cannot change, and those things occasionally do get to me! but, i do take control of my life and make changes that are for me. your life is your own. if you are unhappy with something, it is up to you to make the change, not some one else. You need to make your own priorities and take control.
well thats it from me tonight. maybee another posting in the next few days. this blog will probably go a bit quiet as i travel as my travel blog takes the highlights. but i will continue to post and will probably post on a few ideas and disucssion topics i have. now i ponder if i am talking to my self?
i was always that kid. the one at the back. the one who couldn't. the one who just didn't quite fit. the one who floated from group to group trying to find a place to belong, never quite getting there. and i found my places to belong, to find my purpose. i found happiness in the darkness of the theater and the quiet of the library. a sports lover who found his solace in the shadows. i still attracted my fair share of attention and collected my accolades.
i found joy in the oddest of places. i was happy. i fought some battles, some larger than others. i knew i was never going to be the best academically, because of my learning disability. i knew that i wasn't going to be the best and i was going to be lucky to get into university after a damaged my brain. that was square one all over again. but i battled through. i saw the next day. and i was stronger, even if a little bit damaged for ever.
i made it through uni, i was happy. i found a job, i was happy. i looked in the mirror and i was happy enough with what i saw. until one day i stepped onto the scales.
triple digits.
i realised i had to do something. but that wasn't enough. the day when i discovered that my pants were getting to tight at a size 38 and i was approaching a size 40, that was the turning point. it wasn't anything but that key.
but the question was how to make the change. well here we go.
it wasn't until almost 6 months into my employment at MARC that i decided to commit to it. with a few small changes i had dropped to around the 97 kg mark. and with some support and guidance, i found my way to 90 kgs. but couldn't break it. for about a year i stabilised at that point. but through out the next year i continued. i found a class i enjoyed, i started to improve. i slowly moved from being the middle of the pack to being towards the front. i was no longer that kid. i was average. but i still knew there was more. come the six week challenge in 2009, i decided i was going to go for it. and i did. i committed to making changes. i started to make time for everything i wanted in my life. and eliminated that wasn't important. i started living every day. i started riding my bike to work once a week. i started making decisions for me. i realized that i could be even more than what i had thought i could be. just where would it end? with the support and encouragement of some amazing people i went from being that kid at the back, to be that guy at the front. i achieved level 10 on the beep test. i did a 5km fun run in 26 minutes. and i felt and looked good. but i wondered if i could go further. but then i started to get bogged down in the fact i was leaving. a plane awaited me. i was going over seas.
and i was static. i was walking, but my fitness was not improving. and even going backwards in places. so i didnt go back to the old fall back of "it will be ok in the end". no. i was a changed person, and followed the same advice i gave others. take control. and be the change agent in your life. so i set about exercising once or twice a week. with the walking i was doing each day, it was enough.
then came the day when i was curious. there are scales in the bathroom here, where i live right now. i stepped onto them. and the number came up. 190 pounds. and the next time i stepped onto those scales 180 pounds is the number that greeted me. and then one day i noticed that the needle was sitting just below the small number that said 80kgs. the last time i had weighed in at that weight i was 15/16. nearly a full decade ago. unlike other times, the weight has stayed off. why? because this time, it was life style choices and not a commitment to pushing my self that has made the difference. i eat smaller meals. i eat a good balance of the nutritional groups. i eat fruit again. but it is the advice and the knowledge that i could from the challenges that i knew i could.
so what have i achieved in the past 12 months?
Completed a 5km fun run in under 27 minutes.
started swimming regularly and now do over 1.5kms in a session, pushing towards 2kms.
reached Level 10 in the beep test
probably dropped a pants size.
and i think i am probably the fittest i have been in a very very long time.
now then today i don't think i could do all that. because i haven't been doing any running training. and i am not working out every day. i am merely sustaining what i have achieved.
there is a part of me that know i can go further, but i don't know about my weight. i think i may be close to bottoming out, without compromising muscle mass. (thanks to the BMI i have to weight <75 kgs to be "normal" weight). so i wonder. maybe i can work towards doing something silly like a triathlon. maybe. or an epic canoe trip. or who knows what.
but after all that rambling i will pass on a simple message. i decided to make a change. when i am unhappy with my circumstances i set about making a change. i control my own life and i am master of my own destiny. yes there are things that i cannot change, and those things occasionally do get to me! but, i do take control of my life and make changes that are for me. your life is your own. if you are unhappy with something, it is up to you to make the change, not some one else. You need to make your own priorities and take control.
well thats it from me tonight. maybee another posting in the next few days. this blog will probably go a bit quiet as i travel as my travel blog takes the highlights. but i will continue to post and will probably post on a few ideas and disucssion topics i have. now i ponder if i am talking to my self?
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